It takes work to reach a new level of success and to achieve our goals. We sometimes fear success because we can see that if we had to work so hard to achieve it, then it must follow that we will have to continue to work just as hard to maintain that success.
Today we are going to tap for the fear that success will mean that we will have to keep working as hard to maintain it.
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Often when we are striving for something new we are working toward things we have never achieved before. When we accomplish the goal it can propel us to try and achieve more.
One of the downsides of success is believing that it should be our new normal and anything falling short feels like a failure because we now know of what we are capable.
Today we are going to tap for the fear that success will bring higher (and unreasonable) expectations of ourselves.
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Everywhere we turn we receive information about what will make us happy. Much of this comes from traditions and a shared history of how life is supposed to look.
Taking advantage of the wisdom of the ages can be useful when trying to craft our path in the world but it is important to remember that just because something is good for most people doesn’t mean it right for us.
Today we are going to tap for that feeling of not knowing if we are working toward something because it is best for us or because we feel like it is supposed to be best for us.
Most of the people in our life honestly and truly want what is best for us. The problem comes when they are giving us encouragement and advice based on what they believe is best for us and not what we think is best for us.
It is not that they don’t trust us, but they are seeing our lives through the lens of how they see their own lives.
Today we tap for those times when it feels like others are trying to get us to live up to their definition of happiness and success.
It is good to have passion. It is even better to feel like our goal is within our grasp and that we can take action every day to get there.
There are times when, as we get closer and closer to our goal, it starts to take up more of our time, energy, and attention. When this happens it can create the concern that it will take over to the extent that we neglect other parts of our life.
Today we are going to tap for those times where it feels like our desire for one thing is going to take over our life completely.
Sometimes it feels like our goals and standards are motivated by a sense of duty rooted in family traditions or the expectations of loved ones. When we are working towards a goal that isn’t our own it is hard to stay focused and motivated.
Today we are going to tap for when it feels like we are seeking something not because we want it, but because we are living up to someone else’s standards or expectations.
When we state a new goal it means we have to say that certain aspects of our lives aren’t working the way they should. It means that we have to say that we have failed up to this point.
Today we are going to tap for the fear of admitting that we have made mistakes and haven’t yet reached our goals.
Working Towards My Goal Means I Have To Admit I Have Failed Up To Now
(audio 4m02s)
There’s a part of me that wants to move forward…There’s a part of me that wants to go after this new goal…There’s a part of me that wants transformation…But in order to have transformation…I have to be honest with the fact…That what I have right now…Isn’t perfect…What I have right now…Is full of problems…And I’ve created the circumstance I’m in…I’ve made choices to put myself here…And if I’m admitting everything isn’t perfect…I have to also admit that I have failed…I have to admit that I made mistakes…I have to admit that I made bad choices…I have to admit that I where I am isn’t healthy…I have to admit I haven’t taken action soon enough…And all of those things are hard to do…But regardless how I got to this point…Regardless of the choices before now…The fact that I am making a choice…And wanting to move forward…Is a good thing…The fact that I am making choices…And wanting to strive…Is a good thing…Things were not perfect up to this moment…I’ve created a life that is far from perfect…But what is much more important…Is my willingness today…To make a different choice…To make a better choice…To make new choices…Yes, I have made bad choices…Yes, I have failed…And to strive for something new is to admit that…But being honest with where I am…And striving for where I want to be…Is more important than the choices that have led to now…I give myself permission to move forward…Being honest with where I’ve been…And striving for where I want to be.
I’m sure you know the old Henry Ford quote, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.”
Sometimes to move forward we have to believe in something that is bigger than we have ever believed in the past.
Even if we expand our belief of what is possible just a little, it will make a difference.
Today we are believing and acting bigger than we have before.
Acting Bigger Than We Thought Possible
(audio 3m00s)
I know my belief…In what is possible…Impacts my ability…To be successful…When I doubt…When I think something is hard…When I think I’m not capable…I find proof in my environment…And I find proof in my day…That this is true…When I believe something is possible…When I believe something is doable…Even when I know it’s hard…I find proof and belief…In my day…I find opportunity…I find silver linings…I find lessons…I find new ways to move forward…I’m not asking myself to be naïve…To have unrealistic expectations…To think that if I believe…That’s enough…It takes much more than belief…It takes planning…It takes action…But my own belief…In success…Will help me to move along…In a positive way…I give myself permission…To believe that I can have better…To believe that I can have more…To believe in success…To believe in progress…And I give myself permission…To take advantage…Of those opportunities…That my belief…Helps me to see.
With the exception of Daddy Warbucks from Annie, I can’t think of a single rich, successful person who is nice in movies.
And I understand why. It doesn’t make for very good drama. Good drama is the little guy struggling to overcome obstacles against all the odds.
Because of this, it is easy for us to hold the belief (on a subconscious level) that if we become successful then we will also turn into a horrible person.
Let’s tap to clear that belief.
What If I End Up Like Those Other Arrogant Successful People
(audio 3m35s)
I want to move forward…I want to be successful…I want to have opportunities…I want to grow…But there’s a part of me…The subconscious part of me…That believes successful people…Are mean and nasty…Successful people are arrogant…Successful people are full of themselves…Successful people have taken advantage of others to get ahead…And even though I consciously know this is not true…There’s a part of me that’s been given the story over and over and over again…It’s a story that shows up all the time in pop culture…And it’s really easy to buy into…I know people who have been successful who aren’t jerks…I know people who have been successful who aren’t arrogant…I know people who are successful who didn’t step on others to get that success…It is possible for me…To have success and move forward…Without turning into an arrogant jerk…Without becoming nasty…Just because I’m successful…It doesn’t mean…I lose who I am…I can be successful…And keep my values…I can be successful…And keep my purpose…I can be successful…And be a good person…Success won’t make me arrogant…Success is simply me being me to my full potential.
It is easy to be motivated when we are in pain because we want to be pain free.
It is easy to be motivated when we are close to our goal because we can almost taste success.
The hardest time to move is when we are in the comfortable middle. It is not what we want, but it isn’t so painful that we are motivated to push forward.
To step out of this comfort zone is scary because it means we could lose comfort.
Let’s tap for the courage to step out of our comfort zone today.
Stepping Out Of The Comfort Of Today
(audio 3m40s)
I’m enjoying my life…I recognize I have a lot of good things…I’m not fighting for survival…I’m not fighting off danger at every moment…I have what I need to get by…But that isn’t necessarily enough…I have dreams…I have goals…I have aspirations…I want to move forward…But that means I’m going to have to leave my comfort zone…And there’s a part of me that does not want to leave my comfort zone…There’s a part of me that wants to stay right here…There’s a part of me that doesn’t want to transition…Because trying to transition is work…And work can be painful…And work can lead to failure…The part of me that wants to stay in this comfort zone…Is trying to take care of me…Is trying to make my day pain-free…And I appreciate the fact that it’s doing that…That it’s trying to keep me safe…But, today, I give myself permission…To step out of my comfort zone…To try something new…To try something I’m not going to be perfect at…That’s going to move me towards my goal…Because even though I’m experiencing this…I want to move forward…And I want to have more…I give myself permission to step out…Knowing that the rewards of stepping out…Outweigh the risk…Because those rewards are going to be lasting.