It is good to have big goals. They help us to stretch. They help us to move to places that we never thought possible before.
But sometimes those big goals leave us feeling overwhelmed, like they are too big, or too far, and that we aren’t made for greatness.
When this happens it can hinder our progress because it feels fruitless to work towards something we will never achieve.
Today we are going to tap for when our goals feel so big that they seem impossible.
As we work towards our goals it’s usual to come across many new skills that we need to learn. When this happens it can feel like that we don’t have enough time to do everything we need to do, much less find the time to master new skills.
Today we are going to tap for feeling overwhelmed by how much we feel like we have to learn in order to get everything done.
There are times when it is really easy to dream big. If feels like everything is possible. Later we come back to our dreams and goals only to feel like they are way too big. They feel like they are a million miles away and there is no way we could achieve them.
Today we are going to tap for when it feels like our goals are too big and too unreasonable.
When Our Goals Feel Unreasonable
(audio 4m12s)
I’m glad I have big dreams…I’m glad I want something more…But it’s not what I have right now…And the gulf between where I am…And where I want to be…Is so big…That it feels completely unreasonable…It’s so big…It feels like it’s impossible to get from here to there…It’s so big…I don’t even know where to start…It’s as if I’ve said…I want my skin to turn green and I’m going to sprout wings…It seems that impossible and that far away…And even though in moments like this…My goal feels like it’s a million miles away…I recognize I have achieved a lot of things that felt like they were a million miles away…I recognize that I don’t get to my goals in one giant step…I get there moving over time…Bit by bit…Little by little…I give myself permission…To know it’s OK to dream big dreams…To know it’s OK to have goals that feel like they’re a long way away…And recognize that if I take small steps…Engaging those goals in a small way…And make a small bit of effort today…It’s going to make a huge difference…It’s going to help me to move forward…It’s going to help me to strive…All I need to do in this moment…Is appreciate the goal…And appreciate it’s possible…Even if I have no clue how to get from here to there…Even if it seems foolish to dream that big…Small steps…And regular action…Will move me to the goal…And before I know it…The impossible will become possible.
When learning new things we often have to ask for help.
Sometimes we feel stupid and embarrassed because it means we have to admit to others that we don’t know something.
Today we are going to tap for being uncomfortable about asking for help.
Asking For Help Is Embarrassing Because It Lets People Know I Don’t Know
(audio 4m10s)
I understand I need to learn something new…I understand I need to gain knowledge…The only way I’m going to move forward…Is if I learn something new…And to learn something new…Often times what I have to do…Is I have to ask for help…Because there are people around me who have the knowledge I need…There are people around me who have the experience I need…There are people around me who’ll help me to move forward…But when I ask for help…I’m signaling the fact…That I don’t know something…And there’s a part of me that’s afraid…That if I signal the fact that I don’t know something…People will think less of me…People are going to think I’m not competent…People are going to think I’m not capable…People are going to think that I can’t handle it…People are going to think I’m downright stupid…But the truth is…When I ask for help…I’m not saying, “Hey I’m stupid”…Instead I’m saying, “Hey you know something really important”…I’m saying, “You are really valuable”…I’m saying, “You have knowledge and wisdom, please share that with me”…And so, people aren’t going to think I’m stupid…People aren’t going to think I’m incompetent…They are going to feel honored…They are going to feel appreciated…Because I’m pointing out…They can do something important…That I can’t do…I give myself permission…To know there are lots of people who want to help me…I give myself permission…That people would feel bad if I didn’t ask them for help…I give myself permission to take action…Ask for the help I need…So I can move forward…I’m not saying I’m stupid…I’m not saying I’m incompetent…When I’m asking for help I simply don’t know…And everything in my life…Is something I didn’t know…At some time…I’ve survived asking for help before…I’ll survive now…And it will speed my progress to my goal.
Learning something new can be intimidating. This is especially true when we have attempted to learn something new in the past and failed.
Today we are going to tap for worrying about how trying to learn something new will work out.
I Have Failed At Learning New Things In The Past
(audio 3m30s)
I know I need a new skill…I know I need to learn more…In everything that I do…From the simple to the most complex…Is something I didn’t know how to do at one point…I had to learn how to do it…So I know it’s possible for me to learn…I spend my entire life learning…I learn new things without even thinking about it…But there’s a part of me…That is worried that this new thing I need to learn…Is going to be too much…Is going to be too hard…I’m going to fail at learning this…I’m going to look foolish trying…And it’s going to be a big gigantic waste of time…It’s good that I don’t want to waste my time…It’s good that I don’t want to look foolish…But it’s possible for me…To learn something new…In a way that is far from perfect…In a way where I sometimes mess things up…In a way where I make mistakes…And I’m OK with that…Part of the learning process…Is not getting it right…Part of the learning process…Is learning from my mistakes…There are very few things in my life…That I got right on the first try…And it’s OK…For me to not get this right…I’ve learned things before…I’ve learned lots of things before…This is no different…Even though it looks hard…Even though there’s a chance of failure…I can take it…And I can learn it…Because I was made for learning…I am always learning…And my goal is valuable enough…That I’m going to spend the time I need to learn it.
We want to be responsible for our own success. We want it to feel like we have earned it all by our own effort.
Because of this we don’t ask for help.
But we don’t have to do it all! Sometimes we need help and it is OK to ask for help.
Today we are going to tap for being easy with ourselves when it comes to reaching out for help.
If I Don’t Do (Or Know How To Do) Everything For My Success I Have Failed
(audio 3m57s)
I want to be successful…I want to be responsible for my own success…I want to know that I worked really hard…And to have the sense that I have earned all of this…But there’s a part of me…That feels like the only way…That this can happen…Is if I am doing it all…If I am doing everything…Because if I don’t…Then it’s not my success…It’s someone else’s success…It’s something that’s been handed to me…It’s not about me…But I don’t expect myself to grow my own food…I don’t expect myself to make my own clothes…I don’t expect myself to fix my own car…I don’t expect myself to build my own house…There are lots of things that I get help with…And getting help as I move towards my goals…Especially with the things that I don’t know how to do…The things I’m not very skilled at…And the things that I don’t want to do…Will save me time…Will save me effort…Will give me the opportunity…To concentrate on the things…That are truly my genius…The things that I am made for…The things that I am about…It is not a failing to get help…It is not a failing to reach out…It is not a failing to hand over the things to someone else…When it is their specialty…The success can be mine…Even if I don’t do it all…The success can be mine…Even if I don’t understand it all…It simply matters that…I’m doing what I can…And I’m getting help with what I can’t…It’s not a failure…That’s being smart.
One of the things that holds us back is our need to be perfect. The part of us that wants to be perfect wants us to stay safe. When we are perfect we can’t be criticised and we don’t have to do anything again.
We will NEVER be perfect so as long as we hold on to needing to be perfect we will never be able to act.
Today we tap to know that, “It’s OK for me to take imperfect action, now.”
Imperfect Action
(audio 3m05s)
There’s a part of me that wants to be perfect…There’s a part of me that wants to get it exactly right…Because if I get it exactly right…Then it’s going to be easy for me to be successful…Because if I get it exactly right…Nothing can possibly go wrong…So there’s a part of me that’s going to prevent me from acting…Until I know I can do it perfectly…It’s going to wait for more information…It’s going to wait for me to have more skill…It’s going to wait for a more perfect environment to make a choice…But the truth is…I need to be able to take action…In an environment that’s imperfect…By someone who is imperfect…Because there’s never going to be exactly the perfect time…And I’m never going to be exactly perfect…And if I wait for the perfect time…And if I wait for me to be perfect…I’m never going to take action…I give myself permission….To know that it’s OK…To make an imperfect action…At an imperfect time…In an imperfect way…With imperfect knowledge…And even if it doesn’t work out perfectly…It’s possible to have it work out great…There have been lots of times where it worked out great…Where it was far from perfect…I want to be good…I want to be successful…And I don’t need perfect…To be good and successful…I give myself permission….To make choices…From an imperfect space…With imperfect information…With imperfect skills…And an imperfect moment…Knowing I can make all of those things work out.
I’m sure you know the old Henry Ford quote, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.”
Sometimes to move forward we have to believe in something that is bigger than we have ever believed in the past.
Even if we expand our belief of what is possible just a little, it will make a difference.
Today we are believing and acting bigger than we have before.
Acting Bigger Than We Thought Possible
(audio 3m00s)
I know my belief…In what is possible…Impacts my ability…To be successful…When I doubt…When I think something is hard…When I think I’m not capable…I find proof in my environment…And I find proof in my day…That this is true…When I believe something is possible…When I believe something is doable…Even when I know it’s hard…I find proof and belief…In my day…I find opportunity…I find silver linings…I find lessons…I find new ways to move forward…I’m not asking myself to be naïve…To have unrealistic expectations…To think that if I believe…That’s enough…It takes much more than belief…It takes planning…It takes action…But my own belief…In success…Will help me to move along…In a positive way…I give myself permission…To believe that I can have better…To believe that I can have more…To believe in success…To believe in progress…And I give myself permission…To take advantage…Of those opportunities…That my belief…Helps me to see.
Dealing with uncertainty is really tough. Often we find it easier to respond to situations that are consistently bad than those that are inconsistent and unpredictable.
When things are inconsistent we are constantly on guard and spend a great deal of energy looking out for change which makes it hard for us to move forward in a meaningful way.
Today we are going to tap for times of instability and working our way back to balance.
Struggle With Stability
(audio 3m53s)
When things are unstable…When things are in flux…It’s hard to make choices…It’s hard to move forward…Because there’s that part of me…That is really worried…That if I go rushing forward…Into this unstable environment…It’s going to be harder for me to be successful…It’s going to be harder for me to achieve what I want…It’s going to be harder for me to move through the world…In a way that is known…Which will lead to my success…But I recognize the fact…That the world is not always stable…That there are variables that are unknown…And there are things that could change in a moment’s notice…And I give myself…And my entire system permission to know…That it’s OK…To step into places…That are unstable…And contain unknowns…I give myself permission to know I’m not going to know…With a 100% certainty…The best and right choice to make…In each and every circumstance…This doesn’t mean I’m going to be thoughtless…This doesn’t mean I’m going to go rushing in…It simply means…That as I step into this…And as I step into the world…I’m going to do in such a way…That I’m going to honor the inconsistencies…And the things that are unstable…And I’m going to make choices…And not simply stand on the sideline…I’ve handled inconsistency before…And I can do it again…Just because things are unstable…Doesn’t mean I can’t act…Just because things are unstable…Doesn’t mean I can’t know what’s right for me…I give myself permission…To thoughtfully…And carefully…Make good choices today…In the face of instability…Knowing and trusting…I’m completely capable of doing…Exactly that.
I have heard it from a lot of you. “There are so many good things to tap to on the site, but I am just feeling overwhelmed by it all!”
That’s OK!
You don’t have to do it all. AND you don’t have to do it all right now!
Today we are going to tap for feeling overwhelmed by how much there is to do, and how many tools we have at our disposal.
Too Much To Tap To
(audio 2m42s)
There’s so much I want to accomplish…There’s so much I want to do…There are so many tools in front of me…And I feel like I’m failing…If I’m not using them all…If I’m not tapping every day…If I’m not tapping perfectly…It just feels like there’s so much…But I don’t have to do it all…I don’t have to do every single tap-along…I don’t have to use every single tool…By simply taking the time…To be present to what I need to deal with…That will make a difference…I don’t have to do today’s audio…I don’t have to do every audio..I can choose the one that makes sense for me…When it makes sense for me…Without having to do them all…