Tag: 1.13

When we make a change or reach a new goal the people who are closest to us will notice.

We will look different, carry ourselves differently, or be spending our time in new ways.

This new found attention can feel scary to that part of us that is comfortable flying beneath the radar.

If we fear that our success will equal us being noticed then we will find ways to sabotage ourselves and shield ourselves from that attention.

Let’s tap for the fear of being noticed once we are successful.

If I Am Successful Everyone Will See Me
(audio 4m45s)

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I want to move forward…I want to be successful…I want to achieve my goals…I want to have better…I want to challenge myself…And reach new heights…But there’s a part of me that’s worried…That if I achieve…That if I move forward…That if I’m successful… I’m setting myself up for trouble…Because if I’m successful…If I do this well…If I exceed expectations…My new level of success…Will be what is expected of me in future…Everybody will expect more of me…And I’m working hard to meet these goals…And if they expect more of me…I have to work harder all the time…I give myself permission to know…I can be successful…And meet my standards…I can be successful…And meet my expectations…Because my standards…And my expectations…Are what are most important…It’s less important…What others hold me to…I can be successful…I can move forward…Without making it harder for myself…By feeling like expectations have been raised…

It seems silly that we would be afraid of achieving success.

It is one of the biggest fears I see in my clients when it comes to short circuiting their success.

When we succeed we can raise the expectations of others and this can be scary. When we fear this we will make sure that we fail.

Let’s tap for worrying about raising others’ expectations.

Fear Of Being Successful
(audio 4m17s)

I want to be successful…I want to move forward…I want to achieve my goals… I want life to be better…I want life to be fuller…I want life to be richer…But for some reason… success is scary…When I’m successful, I raise other people’s expectations…When I’m successful, I raise my own expectations…When I’m successful, I taste the good life…And it’s possible to lose it…And the pain of knowing better and then losing it…Feels like it’s so much worse…Than never experiencing the pleasure of success at all…When things go well…There’s always the sense…That the other shoe is going to drop…And if I’m successful…I will be constantly looking over my shoulder…For that other thing to go wrong…But I give myself permission…To recognize I can manage success…I can enjoy success…Without feeling overburdened by new expectations…Without feeling overburdened by others’ expectations…Without feeling overburdened of the fear of losing success…It’s possible I might have success and lose it…But since I achieved it once…I know I can achieve it again…And again…And again…Success will change my life…It will bring new things…The unknown can be scary…But I can manage these new and different things…Nice big deep breath.

I hear from clients all the time that they just want to share their gifts with the world. They know they are called to do more or offer more. The work we do on their self sabotage is to help them to share their gifts more widely.

But what if you don’t know what your gifts are?

Today we are going to tap for discovering our gifts and/or seeing them more clearly.

Figuring Out What Our Gifts Are
(audio 3m45s)

I want to use my gifts…I want to share my gifts…I want others to profit from my gifts…
I don’t want to squander my gifts…And that’s a really lovely idea…But there are times when I don’t know what my gifts are…I can’t see them clearly…And I can’t see how they fit into the world…And when this happens…It’s really frustrating…I feel like I’m wasting time…And I’m wasting opportunity…Because this moment can’t be here again…And if I don’t use my gifts right now…It was a waste…But the biggest gift I have…Is the gift of my intention…And the gift of my presence…And even if I don’t know my exact gifts… And even if I don’t know how to use what I have…In this particular moment…By being present to this moment…By being fully present to this moment…I will recognize opportunity…And I will recognize inspiration…I will use what I have…To respond to right now…Even if I don’t know my exact gifts…And even if I’m not using what I do best in this moment…That is much less important…Than my presence to this moment…
How I respond…And how I’m present…If I do that…Through opportunity and inspiration…My gifts will reveal themselves…And I will know which one to use now.

One of the things that holds me back is the worry that if I do something well then everyone will expect me to achieve that standard again.

When this happens a part of me holds me back from success to make sure I don’t create higher expectations that I will have to live up to in the future.

Let’s tap for this worry!

Expectations
(audio 3m36s)

I want to move forward…I want to be successful…I want to achieve my goals…I want to have better…I want to challenge myself…And reach new heights…But there’s a part of me that’s worried…That if I achieve…That if I move forward…That if I’m successful…I’m setting myself up for trouble…Because if I’m successful…If I do this well…If I exceed expectations…My new level of success…Will be what is expected of me in future…Everybody will expect more of me…And I’m working hard to meet these goals…And if they expect more of me…I have to work harder all the time…I give myself permission to know…I can be successful…And meet my standards…I can be successful…And meet my expectations…Because my standards…And my expectations…Are what are most important…It’s less important…What others hold me to…I can be successful…I can move forward…Without making it harder for myself…By feeling like expectations have been raised…